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December 7, 2006
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Conservative Christianity by Eshto Conservative Christianity by Eshto
Political cartoon that was published in the Badger Herald, a campus newspaper here in Madison. Printed Tuesday, February 7, 2006.

The context of this is important. I was pretty active in the fight against the constitutional ban on gay marriage and civil unions in my state. I wrote editorials and attended a lot of debates, including a public hearing at the state capitol.

I heard ALL of these ideas and much, much more (and worse) come straight from the mouths of the conservative politicians, religious leaders and average joes who supported this limitation on the rights of LGBT people. This includes Gundrum and Fitzgerald, the two lawmakers who wrote the amendment; Julaine Appling, leader of the Family Research Institute, an anti-gay group here in Wisconsin; a conservative lawyer who, I swear to god, said that it is ridiculous tha equality would apply to everyone (???); a crazy old man who said his Bible talks to him and that gay people caused hurricane Katrina.

So there are a few conservatives and/or Christians who take issue with this cartoon. Well you know what pal, if this upsets you, and if you don't feel this represents you or your beliefs, then it's not me you should be taking issue with. It's your leaders, and the homophobia ingrained in your cultures.
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ThatFreakyZephyr Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2014  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Give me a hug!
Dumuzi-ouji Featured By Owner Oct 1, 2014
Lol Christianity is all a evil lie anyways.
zephyrsusurrus Featured By Owner Aug 31, 2014
I couldn't agree with you more.   I grew up in a church that said it was a ''sin,'' but they never preached a sermon as to just why it was, let alone a sermonette or even a Bible study session. After years of attendance, I finally screwed up the courage to talk to one of the ministers about my ''problem.''  He blew me off and changed the subject to other matters.  His superior wasn't any more willing to talk about it with me.   It wasn't long after that I quit attending.  I'm better off now.  
Voltex12345 Featured By Owner May 17, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
boy these conservatives are really something huh?
they're obsessed with a fetus from successful conception to 9 months
after that they don't want to know about you, don't wanna hear from you, NOTHING!
no natal care,
no day care,
no head start,
no school lunch,
no food stamps,
no well fare,

if you're pre-born you're precious
if you're pre-schooled, you're fucked

conservatives don't give a shit about you until you reach MILITARY AGE!
THEN they think you're just fine XD
JUST what they're looking for

Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers, grow them up to believe that throwing your life away in a horrific, bloody and brutally way because of a war that was caused by one president insulting the other president's tie is "honorable" somehow
they choose to serve, (well actually their parents and the government pressures them to) and then they get all surprised that they come back without a leg.
or that their friends are in coffins. i share absolutely no sympathy for people who participate in a war willingly.
fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

but back to this pro life shit.
"pro life" my ass, they are killing doctors!
what? they'll do anything they can to save a fetus but if it grows up to be a doctor they "just might have to kill it"?
they are not pro live, they are anti-woman!


they believe a woman's primary function is to serve as a nursing device for the state

you don't see any of these white, anti abortion women voluntarily having any black fetuses transplanted into their uteruses do you?
or adopting a whole lot of crack babies do you?
no, of course not, that sounds more like something CHRIST would do...
ok now IS a fetus a human being? (that seems to be the central question)
well if they are, how come the sentences don't count them?
how come if they have a miscarriage, they don't have a funeral?
how come people say "we have 2 children and one on the way" instead of saying "we have 3 children"?
people say life begins at conception,
i say life began in the oceans billions of years ago and it's a continuous process!
you shouldn't look for consistency in thee anti-abortion arguments, trust me, you won't find any.

see the really hardcore people will tell you that "life begins at fertilization" when the sperm fertilizes the egg
which is usually a few moments before the guy says "gee i'm sorry honey, i was gonna pull out but the phone rang and it startled me"
but even after the egg is fertilized, it STILL takes six or seven days before it reaches the uterus and pregnancy begins, and not many egg make it that far
80% of fertilized eggs are flushed out of her body once a month during those "delightful few days she has" (that's another "treat" for the gall)

they end up on sanitary napkins and yet, they are in fact: "fertilized eggs"

so basically what these pro life ass-holes are telling us is that any woman who has had more than one period is a serial killer! call them the Genocide causers why don't you? XD

but ok, if they REALLY wanna get serious on this, what about all the sperm that is wasted when a state executes a condemned man and one of these pro life guys is watching and ejaculates in his pants huh?
here's a guy with his jockey shorts full of Vinnies and Debbies, and nobody's saying a word to the guy.... not every ejaculation deserves a name!

oh, speaking of consistency:
catholics (which i was until i reached the age of reason) and other Christians are against both abortion and homosexuals...
leave these poor people alone for pete's sake!
you'd think they'd make natural allies

and to my friends the catholics :D (Big Grin)
when John Joseph'O Connor, the popes and all of these other bishops, pastors, priests and fathers experience their first traumatizing rape experiences, their first pregnancies, their first labor pains and then have raised a couple of 7 children on a minimum wage, working 2 full time jobs, for less payment than your male co-workers who never miss a chance to slap your ass whenever they can and even get demanded to give your fat, bald, butt ugly boss an occasional blow-job if you wanna keep your job...
THEN i'll be glad to hear what ever they have to say against abortion, pretty sure it'd be quite interesting.

And OH! In the meantime we should tell these priests, who took a vow of chastity, to keep their hands off the altar-boys.
when Jesus said "suffer the little children, COME on to me" THAT'S NOT WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT!!!

if you think a fetus is more important than a woman, try getting a fetus to wash the shit stains out of your underwear...
... for no pay and no pension.
PAPhilly Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2014
So, how was Occupy...?

It's comical how little you understand us =P (Razz) 

Seriously, you don't even have to believe what they're saying, but just LISTEN to a conservative news source and see what we ACTUALLY believe, instead of praising CNN and MSNBC for saying what they want you to think Conservatives  are all about rather than actually telling you.

Oh, and we're very pro-life, pro-independence and pro-job. Welfare should be temporary, LIFE is precious, before birth unto death.

War is a necessary evil that no man should have to go through. It is bloody, it is brutal and it grinds a man (or woman) down; but it's a necessary evil. If those brave men and women didn't go and serve with honor overseas, they'd have to serve HERE, in the United States, fighting back our enemies on our own soil. I'd prefer my grandfathers and uncles having fought in Vietnam and Korea rather than in Philadelphia and New York!

Killing doctors? I haven't the slightest clue what you are talking about; doctors are absolutely vital to sustained human civilization; who in their right mind would think of killing them?

Women nursing for the state? WHAT? Apparently you've never heard of the thousands of women serving overseas, such as Kim Campbell and Jessica Lynch. Women should have full equality in American society, a far cry from the superiority Democrats whine for. Black fetuses? Again, what? That has no bearing on this, as the woman's immune system would probably reject ANY fetus not her own as hostile, much like a wrong blood type transfusion or a wrong kidney transplant. Miscarried babies do sometimes have funeral rites, but they can't put the baby in the ground because, in case your "open mind" can't wrap around this, the baby's corpse is inside of the mother. And the sentence "two children and one on the way" is just an expression used to show that the child is unborn, as in not out of the mother's uterus yet. And no, we're not calling mothers who have their "time of the month" serial killers; in fact, that just seems like mud-smearing to me. If you're going to bash the Republican Party for its beliefs, at least use valid points, thank-you.

We're not against homosexuals or even the practice of homosexuality; we just don't think that they should be allowed to marry. Although, personally, I disagree with that notion because although I may disagree with it, I have no right to trample on their lives for that notion.

God in his infinite wisdom works THROUGH evolution and the two aren't mutually exclusive. Oh, and I do find the priests that take advantage of children vile and disgusting, but they are a small minority.

You have all the right in the world to disagree with me; or at least in the United States; and I fully accept that. I don't agree with what you're saying (it doesn't make much sense, for that matter) but I will defend to the death your right to say it. Have a nice day, ma'am/sir.
Voltex12345 Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
did you just say war is... necessary?

very well then since cameras don't lie...
(viewer discression is advised)

by all means explain the "reason" behind all this
besides you know... "a book told me to do it" and "so that others can live with their bellies full and to be able to complain that their limos are scratched"

i urge you to get a better grasp on factual reality
because in the name of your "good lord" people will do this to some one or worse if they so much as are left handed
PAPhilly Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2014
I believe that war, from AMERICA's viewpoint- I don't speak for ISIS, Iraq, Afghanistan or anyone else except my own home nation- to be a NECESSARY EVIL, meaning if assholes like ISIS are committing genocide, it's our duty- whether you believe in God or not- to be decent human beings and put an end to it! After World War II, we PROMISED "never again" in reference to the Holocaust. Now, because ISIS is attacking Christians, everyone's turning a blind eye. Because the Congolese are killing 27 million Africans in a part of the world no nation has economic interests in, nobody cares. I commend Obama for launching airstrikes on ISIS, it's the DECENT, MORAL thing to do, whether or not I agree with many of his other policies. I only hope it's enough to defeat those sick FUCKS over there.

If YOU don't think we should be stopping such genocides, then BY ALL MEANS, just say so and don't twist and hide behind the very facts that support military intervention! Disgraceful!

And you believe me, I have a FINE grasp on "factual reality," and that "factual reality" is that if our leadership doesn't stop them in Iraq today, WE THE PEOPLE are gonna have to be fighting them in Philadelphia, or New York, or Montana tomorrow. History repeats, douchebag. Get a better grasp on factual reality and come back when you find evidence that contradicts anything I just said. And if you have the AUDACITY to come back with more personal insults or- God forbid- AGREE with ISIS or the Taliban, or the LRA or any other terrorist groups, then FUCK. YOU.
Voltex12345 Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
a necessary evil to be spread to other countries then... hmmh

do you honesntly believe the wars your country has participated in were any diferent?
you have had a lot more wars, the most bloody ones too, you're practically one of the only countries that has had civil wars at all, yet you've had more than one.

do i honestly look like i agree with Isis? or war in general? whoosh, did it really just fly right by your head what my point was supposed to be?

didn't i just show you an example of the problem?
i was not complaining about your "war is ok, as long as it's not on my backyard" attitude
i was complaining about your "war itself is necessary" atitude.

honestly no i don't think you do have a significant grasp of the status quo, the "proud history" and the gravity of coming events.

i actually agree that certain necessary evils are the most adequate to solving certain specific problems. believe me i do, you have to break a few eggs to make a few omlets.
i understand and agree mind you. but there's a fine line that once crossed, you lose more than you gain and cause greater problems than those you tried to prevent. and trust me when i say "war is necessary" is not one of them.
there are other ways to attack, restore, sabotage and cripple countries without the need of a bombshell that demolecuralizes innocent men, women and children in the civilians division.
all out war is a line you crossed that i can't really overlook so really that's why i said what i said.
when war insues, no one wins, no one "gains" anything, no problems are solved, instead, you just create vast amounts more.

-eeeeey using slurs now? classy... XD
you seem to be reacting almost as if had spit in your face or something.
if you're frustrated i'll tell you this to console you.
we've all got problems
i mean just today i had a close minded comment here  on deviantart of this "i'm a proud american" wannabee trying to impress me like i'm his or her drunken father.

oh you don't have to censor me :) i am allowed to share my opinion here on this site.
i'm not posting or writing anything globally ilegal, that infringes the terms of service nor am i making any death threats so i guess i'll just stick with voicing my opinion and saying what ever i please thank you very much, like the critical thinker i am.
you big stinkin........ doodoo head!

Should you really be using those words if you're a christian? :/
or wearing 2 diferent kinds of fabric or color?
or being left handed?
or know what 3 + 6 is?
or wear shoes in church?
or being a woman?
or being a murderer?
or NOT being a murderer?
or not being circumsized?
or having masturbated?
or having pre-marital sex?
or not killing your child should he or she defy you so much as once in their life?
or eat pork?
or being born non heterosexual?
or just plain invoking god's name in vain?
ah wait no that's right, you can do what ever you want as long as you confess and repent.
instant ticket to heaven. (which is also a place of which you'll spend forever and ever for the rest of time in so much bliss that after several millenea you'll grow sick of it and will be unable to stop the agony of no longer apreciating it knowing there are people who never wronged anyone but are burning forever and ever the same time as you or more just for the sin of never even knowing there was a god? yeah that place. i'd say it's like having your favorite entrey for every meal FOREVER, no, not several millenea, (that's when you'll get sick of it) i mean for... evah as in, it won't stop.)

but now that you mention it?
it is quite ironic isn't it?
like as if it's "preferable" that people who had nothing to do with "one president insulting another country's president's bow tie" that ends up engaging in an all out war are all removed of their loving american dream filled homes, stripped of their individuality, trained to be souless killing machines, thrown into a country away from their homes and famillies, to a war zone to kill off other soldiers that were just as unfortunate as them and inoccent civilians of other countries to "rsolve" the "tie insult dilema"

it's an amazing ilusion really... until you find out you made a terrible mistake by inlisiting. or maybe you don't, eithr way it was a stupid move. 0 parts brave, 4 parts stupid.
if it's the price to pay for living in a country,
note: "living" in general,
then fuck that, i'll live elsewhere.

"I commend Obama for launching airstrikes on ISIS, it's the DECENT, MORAL thing to do"
well ofcourse, we have other means, we have other ways, we have cheaper, more elaborate ways to cause less bloodshed and prevent loss of innocent lives and resources, but screw that let's just bomb them all, much more simple, by any means necessary! PRE. TTY decent and moral :dummy:
oh wait right this is text, i feel the need to explicitly say i was being sarcastic here.

i mean see what you're doing here? "i can only speak for myself and my home";
some lines later
"as long as it's not on my home, other countries deserve to be bombed"
i don't follow... i do urge you to develop on that.
what would you say if the war was over there?
you'd willingly die for the greater good?
i mean there's a terrorist right next to you, i'd be pretty ok for you to just have a bomb burn and melt you alive just to make extra sure the terrorist is crispy?

know that there's a diference between necessary and unnecessary, ecxeccive and abuse.
the civilians there have no choice but to live in fear, cope with their lives under the harsh iron fisted hands of tyrants, only to have a "freedom fighter" country come to their "aid" by bombing them along with the tyrants
"hurraaay! the tyrats are dead! oh wait a minute... where's my lower torso?"

i guess as part of your proud history, it was also your duty to:
invade the northen american continent;
nearly exterminate the native american people and enslave the rest;
bring native african people to america to use as slaves, and once that's finished generations later, complain that they were born there; (who valued freedom by the way)
in order to be free from the tyrants that were the white english people (another war there) in order to KEEP the right to enslave the black african people and whipe out the rest of the red indian people, and move west to steal the rest of the land from brown mexican people, and drop their nuclear weapons on their yellow japanese people; (you give us a color, we'll whipe it out)
ah then there's also the KKK;
the neo nazi party
to inflate the banks
cencorship and political news editing;
the civil wars;
the international wars;
the first and second world war;
fox news;
eish you people have participated in a LOT of "duties"...

but who am i kidding... none of that COMPARES to the 9/11 tragedy you people STILL keep bitching about a decade later.
poor thousands of people (i acuallly mean this)
and poor wasted resources...

look since you've "got a grasp of facts"
i guess it's beyond need to tell you that in Isis alone American soldiers alone killed an estimated amount of equivilent to SEVENTEEN 9/11s

i'm swiss! (actually i'm portuguese but i hope you understand the metaphor)
i never engaged in war, but my uncle went to Algeria to literally BUY opressed girls and women from there to bring them out of the country and give them decent lives of their own.
it may not add fast enough (because, you know, it's just one man) but it beats burning them alive.
and if one person can save an estimated amount of 11 people (with such a small amount of money and camels no less)
what's keeping the US from so much as trying to do something similar 10 fold?
there are other ways to sabotage besides bombing.

bombing is an EXCUSE for small effort!
and TO waste more money
sometimes you NEED to waste money in order to stabilize the economy.

Now AGAIN get your facts straight
and until you return be a sport and bring daddy another beer will you?
PAPhilly Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2014
I believe that the wars the United States has fought in were fought to try and protect people from tyranny. Look at the Pacific Theater of World War II, and compare the number of atrocities committed by the Japanese; look at the European Theater and see Nazi genocides; look to Iraq and how Saddam was launching chemical weapons against his own people; look at Vietnam, and our attempts to prevent communism- rule by a few at the suffering of the many- from spreading to the south. And the United States is BY NO MEANS "one of the only countries to have had a civil war" as demonstrated here:…

You don't seem to understand my actual standpoint. I said WAR. IS. A. NECESSARY. EVIL!!!! I don't like it; I wish it never had to happen, but it DOES, goddammit! It DOES, because if we don't stop there THERE today, they're gonna be HERE tomorrow! And war is NEVER "okay," alright you thickskulled dumbass! It's like death and taxes, it HAS to be done! What don't you get about that? It's basic human nature: if they attack me, I AM GOING TO DEFEND MYSELF TO THE DEATH!!! I agree with the great reporter Joe Galloway, who reported on the Vietnam War; don't send our soldiers to their deaths UNLESS IT'S ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. If it's a stupid, petty reason to fight, then how DARE our leadership send men to their deaths over it!

So, fighting wars doesn't solve problems, eh? Tell that to the Jews in Auschwitz and Buchenwald; tell it to the Australians the Japanese surely would have massacred had we not fought back after Pearl Harbor; tell it to the African American slaves we fought to liberate in the South. And Germany, being the world's fourth largest economy and Japan the third, I think have done pretty well for themselves after being destroyed. It's a matter of HOW we go about fixing the issues once we're done. Germany and Japan could EASILY have turned into Iraq like situations, with stubborn insurgencies. But they DIDN'T, because we had a plan going in, a very carefully orchestrated plan- something we lacked in Iraq besides the distant goal of "democracy."

I didn't try to censor you at all; curses are venting my frustration and "big, stinking doodoo head?" Really? Super mature.

I have absolutely no clue what your next ramble is about, I don't have anything against homosexuals, people who are left handed, women, bacon and three plus six is nine. Murderers- if they are indeed proven to be murderers- should face the death penalty. And the confess and repent aspect of our religion? The idea is to be TRULY SORRY for what you've done, not just sarcastically say "I'm sorry," dust off your hands and then go sin again. If you don't UNDERSTAND my religion, don't comment on it, you only make yourself look more stupid.

War over a bowtie? I've never heard of such a war and it's a silly reason to go to one.

Do you not understand ISIS? Their stated goal is for everyone to convert to Islam or die! There's very little room for your "negotiations" there; either you fight back or they kill you!

Never once did I say "as long as it's not here they can get bombed." Never ONCE. Do NOT make up shit that I didn't say; that is sleazy and immature. If you're losing a debate, don't make shit up to make your opponent look bad, okay?

If there was a terrorist about to blow my family to smithereens, I'd tackle him to the ground and shove a knife through his skull. You don't seem to understand; I am willing to do WHATEVER IS NECESSARY to keep my family safe. When I turn eighteen; I'm thinking about joining the National Guard. I plan on fighting them over there so my baby brother and sister don't have to fight them HERE.

I don't commend genocide, as I've made clear multiple times, and Native Americans are no exception to my rule. It was WRONG what we did; but we did it. It's in the past now, and they seem to have forgiven us for it. I only HOPE that's true; I am truly sorry for them. As I stated, I don't agree with slavery and I think that freeing the slaves was a wonderful thing. The KKK, neo-Nazis and other hate groups are WRONG; they are EVIL. That's why I'm part of the Anti-Defamation League; because I strongly believe "NEVER. AGAIN." We have a First Amendment for a reason, so censorship of newspapers is wrong in every way. The First World War was a pointless waste of good young men, but the Second was fought against two of the greatest evils to ever grace this planet. And I don't see why FOX News is such a bad thing; I only watch the Kelly File, Huckabee and the Water's World section of O'Reilly. I have a life, you know; I don't just sit in my home watching FOX all day, brandishing my shotgun.

Let me ask you this, Mr. Portugal; if Basque terrorists blew up San Bento Palace, and detonated dirty bombs in Lisbon, would you be so steadfast in what you're saying about MY country's national tragedies? And maybe people in the United States are unwilling to BUY people because it reminds us far too much of slavery? Maybe people don't have enough room in their homes, or don't have enough money to feed another mouth. You DO realize people in the United States aren't made of money, right?

My facts are straight, now get up of your lazy ass and get your own fucking Guinness.
commisiar Featured By Owner Edited Aug 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
making a biased comment meant to trick people above to support conservatives is not cool.  

Conservatives news media sites are the daily caller, wmd, washington free beacon, national review and Breibart news and FOX the infamous and extremely stupid and insulting right wing echo chamber.  

Their also trying to cause people to get angry with the government or trying to discredit Thomas Pikketies new book right now and trying to cause people to hate the EPA or trying to shut down the federal export import bank.  Business's need that bank to help with loans or they will be almost crippled over seas in other countries.

In case your wondering yes the cons are trying to get you to see that their the bullied guys and the others as bad.

For anyone wondering I'm an independent and I see conservatives as extremely damaging and stupid for all that bullshit they are pulling on capital hill.
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